Mapmaker, Mapmaker, draw me a map
But you better put on your thinking cap!
If you don’t, I think that you’ll be hapless
And in ’94, we’ll be mapless.
Will there be cities left in Serbia
Or will it become all suburbia?
Will peace be absolutely kosher
When the fighting stops in all of Croatia?
What will happen to the Confederation
That was once was so rosy red a nation?
The Confederation of States Independent,
Extremely restive, extremely repentant!
What about Latvia, Lithuania, Estonia?
Is Yeltsin for real, or simply phonier?
Are gone for good, Messrs. Stalin and Lenin?
Do they no longer with red ink, dip their pen in?
Will a most reluctant Albania
Become a part of southern Romania?
Will the memory of an unsteady Bulgaria
Become part of a yet unwritten aria?
And the spectacle of gladiators in the Coliseum
(I’d rather watch ’em than be ’em).
I guess it’s a question that now is moot
Whether or not to give Italy the boot!
Will West Germany remain with Germany East?
Will they own the land or have it leased?
Can they ever get rid of their witches’ coven
By pushing it into an unused oven?
Mapmaker, Mapmaker: Give me a break!
Will the world become just one big wake?
If ever Paris should not remain,
I would become swimmingly in Seine.
With one big wish and a heaving sighful,
Let eternally stand the Tower Eiffel
Would it not be a thought most callous
If something should happen to Buckingham Palace?
Let the London Bridge never fall
And be replaced by a shopping mall!
And don’t forget Ireland, north and south;
Don’t give me your lip or your big mouth!
Don’t poke at my eyes; don’t bite off my nose;
I want to see where the Shannon flows!
Will Turkey be trying to seek a strong peace?
Or will they dirty their hands by dipping in Greece?
Safe for now is Scandinavia;
I guess they have their private savior.
Mapmaker, Mapmaker, what do you say?
Has our world become just one big bidet?
There’s the Middle East, land of the Pharaohs,
Civilization’s cradle, the straits and narrows.
Will Israel remain with Golan one?
(A tougher feat than a hole-in-one.)
And Arabs that may have pants with ants in
Think the Gaza strip is dirty dancin’.
Will Kadafi still maintain his beloved Libya
Or will he shoot himself in the tibia?
And for Saddam Hussein and resurgent Iraq,
Do we page General Schwarzkopf and bring him on back?
Does our Eagle’s bold wings extend to the Kurds
Or is that bad land, well, just for the birds?
Mapmaker, Mapmaker, without thinking cap,
I think that there’s just too many a gap.
Mapmaker, Mapmaker, you are capless
And ’94 will just have to be mapless!
